Adventures in NaPoWriMo 23/30

in the end
we always call in question the beginning
on bad days
i’m sure even God regrets
that whole
“let there be”
and the two of us
made in His image it seems
are no different
me
a bundle of questions
as to where the fall began
you
not raindance enough
to wipe the slate clean
in the beginning
was the word
and the word
has always been love
but words alone are never enough
to hold their weight in water
in the beginning
we try not to anticipate the end
on good days
i’m sure even God believes
that we all
will find redemption
i find it hard to sleep at night
i fear you nightmare of my face
i fear your subconscious will only call up memories of bad days
but in the beginning
the two of us wrong were still our own kind of beautiful
a thing with holding on to
even in the end

Adventures in NaPoWriMo 22/30

i need a vagina to destroy

~Friend and fellow poet, trying to convey his level of frustration at organizing a poetry slam

even the sweetest among us

can dr.jekyl into cyanide

a slip of tongue like razor gash

across a boy’s intention

i believed

you were a poet

but it seems

you are a man

and as such

i guess will do

what men are apt to do

which is to say

will do what any one of us can do

which is to say

i did not know the mr. hyde

you kept shackled in the closet

whipped into submission with your well placed words

how fitting

that your unveiling was a word misspoken

between friends

so frustrated

the only thing you could say

was that on the wrong day

you could be a rapist

i wonder

if hyde justified his behavior

with all the good he knew jekyll would do

the karmic scale set even enough

to nullify any remorse

a priest

who also molests little boys

a wife beater

who serves as a deacon at church

a poet

who needs a vagina to destroy

as soon as the poetry slam is over

i wonder

do we performers take pseudonyms

to be the namesake of our righteousness

the dr.jekylls to the hydes who appear

whenever we put away our pens

the poetic persona a meager mask

for the monsters that we are

sometimes horrific

even in the eyes of those

who we know love us most

i wonder

when jekyll finally broke beneath the weight of being hyde

when did he decide to explain it all away

did he believe that the lack of evil intent

would somehow hold him blameless

do we believe

that we are only responsible for

the words we say on stage

even the sweetest among us

is a coin flip away

from exposing the bitter of real in our bellies

a bad day spark igniting the flame

we hide away at night

dr. jekyll

a brilliant beast of a man

above a quiet torture

i do not expect of you perfection

we are all at some points profane

but mr.hyde

you are a poet

please careful

of what you say

Adventures in NaPoWriMo 21/30

when i grow up

i’ll be the kind of girl

that does not hurt other people

not on purpose

not with a sucker punch

saying something about being whole now

i will finish what i start

think twice before beginning

go back to not making promises

until i know that i can keep them

i will do more with this heart

than beat

and  break

do more with with this love than weep

when i get older

i will be the woman

you always told me i could be