Adventures in Poetry

So. I have found an entirely new level of respect for people who poet for a living. Dead up: my livelihood is not dependent on this hustle, and still I find myself consistently on the brink of overwhelmed. Peep my schedule for the next few:

Tomorrow: Show @ the library (read as monkey dance for people who may be funding our trip to nattionals)
Wednesday: Practice & writing session
Thursday: Practice & recording session
Friday: Show @ gallery hop

Also this month: I'm performing for the COGICs (I'm actually stupid excited about this one. Details to come post-event); doing a thing in Raleigh with Sonia Sanchez (same side comment); two more legs of the Carolina tour, and a few more miscellaneous performances.

I will admit that there is a layer of geeked-upedness hovering above the intensity, but my God - if I needed to do this to pay my rent, I would have had a nervous breakdown like....two third-places ago.

Speaking of breakdowns: thanks to all of you fine folk who endured my whining last week. And a special thanks to those that called/texted to see what was up. A HUGE THANKS to Tie and Chriss for enduring my general vaguness about the goings on of my very brief hospital stay. I love you both.

Mm. The craziness of my schedule has actually led me to forgive my parents for the "get this poetry thing out of your system" comment. Granted: this does make the top ten list of things I wish the folks has never said to me, nevertheless, I do not want to be the 35-year-old who brings her toddler into sports' bars for poetry slams evey Friday night. More than that, I do not want to be the 35-year-old who resents the hell out of her kids because she didn't get to fulfill her twenty-something dreams. So. Touché Mom and Pop, I am getting something out of my system...perhaps not poetry....but something I'll be glad I had the opportunity to say goodbye to.

Nationals coming up in a month and I feel drastically unprepared. But also kinda like....whatev, the words will speak for themselves, and if the audience likes quiet stories about post-adolescent heartbreak I might make the indies. Ha! I'm also kinda intrigued by the fact that southern teams don't appear to be well respected by the Nats community. I mean, let me find out that the poetry scene has some kind of regional beef like rappers circa 1995. Personally, I'm routing for a top five that's two parts Carolina, one part Seattle, one part Shattered Thought, and one part...either Urbana or Loser Slam.

Alright. That's more than enough out of me for one evening. I'll talk to you soon.

Peace Be

Adventures in Whining

So.

I'll admit it.
I got my hopes up.
I expected her to call and wish me a happy birhday, and she didn't. And it hurt.
I will also admit that the fact that my best friend moved away this weekend sucks.
And I will also admit that as much as I recognize the benefts of quitting, I really want to smoke right now.
And it also sucks (for him) that I called the man I keep on a yo-yo because I was lonely, and not because I actually wanted to talk to him.
I will admit that I need to get at least half of my issues under control before I try to be with anybody, even (especially) if I do end up trying yo make it work for real with him.
It sucks that I have to spend the next couple days in the hospital, because I really hate hospitals. I will also admit that I'm lightweight nervous.
I will not admit that I should have let my parents come up here like they wanted to; however, I will admit that I'm lightweight pissed off that they didn't come anyway.
I'm also pissed at myself for complaining. I hate complainers.
*sigh*
I want....something.
I'll let you know when I figure out what it is.

Peace Be

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